It should come as no surprise that I am attracted to elegance. I strive to be elegant at all times and I do my best to encourage those around me to embrace elegance too.
Some of you are progressing along your own journey of transition and along the way, you will discover the style that resonates the best for you. At the same time, there are many of you who are prevented from being or presenting yourself in a girly way due to life circumstances – ranging from at the family level to the society in which you live. For you, it might feel impossible to ever connect with your inner girliness. I believe that this is where elegance comes in.
Allow me to explain. Many people believe that elegance is all about the outfit that you wear – and being dressed in a more vanilla/conservative manner. This is not entirely true. You can be in any feminine presenting outfit and still not be elegant. At the core of true elegance is how you carry yourself – your posture while sitting, standing, walking, etc. Elegance is how you keep your environment neat and tidy. Taking care of your skin – face and body is part of being elegant. All of these things that are at the core of being elegant are things that you can do while wearing boy clothes.
When you are elegant and are conscious of your elegance you give the girl inside you validation and allow her spirit to shine no matter what you are wearing and even if you are not wearing any makeup at all. So join me, be elegant in all you do today. While you’re at it, be supportive and kind to those around you who are also struggling with their own challenges. How will you be expressing your elegance? Let me know. Hugs.
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This post was created by the talented Candie Hart and originally appeared on her Tumblr blog. It is reproduced here with her kind permission. Be sure to check out more about Candie at the end of the post and give her some Pink Femme love.
I realize that there are plenty of people who identify as someone differently than how they were assigned at birth or how they are presently and socially expected to live and claim for themselves. I wish you the best in whatever way you work that out. For me, however, I don’t consider myself as a girl. I’m a boy. I’m male. I’m a man. For that matter, I edge more on the line of athletic male. I’m not big enough in size or ego to claim alpha male status. But one look at me would never scream “Sissy!” I’m manly (however, you might perceive that), but I’m girly to the core. Hear me. I’m a girly boy. I’m girly as a boy. I’m a boy, a male, a man, but I’m girly…oh so girly. And if it wasn’t for fear for my family’s well-being, I’d portray myself as even girlier than I presently display. And no, I’m not talking about cross-dressing, though that’s a part of it. I truly am girly.
And that leads me back to the original caption that was made a few years ago. I stand by these words. Oh, they are so true of me and how I feel about myself. I am NOT less of a man than any other man all because I wear panties and bras and cute girly sneakers. I know that how I act, talk, dress, or portray myself will never make me more of a woman. It’s just not possible for me. I can’t claim intersexuality, though, who knows unless tests are taken. I can’t claim gender dysphoria, though I lament for those who do. I can’t even claim insanity, even though my wife might argue that. lol, I am a boy, simply put. And I’m girly. People around me expect differently, but I am girly. I can’t shake that, I can’t forsake that, I can’t nullify that. It’s a part of me. It’s me.
At the end of the day, I think girly boys have to figure out if they intend to be a model of societal expectations or if they choose to be true to themselves. [Let me interject. You move at your pace, in your way, and in your time. Don’t make life-long decisions based on cultural expectations] I know what I choose. I choose not to be defined by my gender. I choose to see myself as a human being who has much to offer to this world, however, that might be manifested. And if that means a manifestation of girliness, then I’m proud to be girly. I’m not more or less, male or female. I am who I am. And that means, for the sake of religious-minded folks, I am the image of God…who also portrayed Himself in feminine ways, btw. But I digress. Oh my! Did I just go there?! Yes, I did, and I make no apologies for that. But I digress.
Be you. Is that so hard? Just be you. And while you’re at it, love someone who needs love in their life.
I love you all!
CandieHart
Candie is an enthusiast for all things fit and femme. All of her very creative captions carry the same positive, motivating ethos that I envisioned for Pink Femme when I started this site. Use this link to go to Candie’s blog on Tumblr and give her captions some much-needed love.
If you would like to see more of Candie’s longer-form content with captions here on Pink Femme – here is the link to the list of posts that have been published.
If you are new to Pink Femme, be sure to check out the unique 40 Steps To Femme program that will help you to feel more girly one delicate step at a time.